Congratulations, America. You’re still older than this little human. You are, however, nowhere near as awesome. Unless. . .
You enjoy putting your whole fist in your mouth and gagging on it. You may also enjoy sticking a few fingers in your mouth, cramming your fist in on top of that, and then gagging. The only real requirement here is never learning to not gag yourself.
Your weight and length put you in the 28th percentile. Your giant head, however, sits solidly in the 80s. This is down from the 90s, though, so congratulations on being less of a bobblehead.
You wake up in various positions, none of which match the ones you were laid down in. 90 degree turn? Check. 180 degree turn? Double check.
You make me try everything in my power to make you giggle again because the first time was so magical. Your giggles are also more in response to a rousing game of Punch Dad than being tickled.
You like to take charge and hold your own bottle. . .and promptly drop it. You’re also a fan of blowing my mind by lifting your toys to gnaw on, reaching and grabbing onto everything in your activity gym, and putting your pacifier in your mouth (sideways but you still managed to do it on your own). Occasionally you pull your pacifier out of your mouth, hand it to me, and then lose your mind because it’s no longer in your mouth. This is only fun at 2 in the am. Not unlike Waffle House.