Back Home Again in Indiana
We watch A LOT of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Like at least one episode a morning a lot (take your judgement elsewhere – a) it lets us get ready in the morning, and b) Boogs doesn’t actually sit through more than 2 minutes at a time). And all this time spent with Mickey and crew has led to some insights.
Mickey: Clearly the victim of helicopter parents because this dude is constantly asking for help and can’t find anything ever. May also be suffering from early onset dementia because seriously, who forgets they need the magic words to make the clubhouse appear every. single. time?
Minnie: Oppressed housewife in the making with questionable at best cooking skills. Onion Potato Tomato Blender Soup is not a thing. Sign up for Pinterest, girlfriend. It’s free.
Daisy: Di. Va. Oh no my shoe broke someone fix it. Oh no I have stage fright everyone do my talent show dance that’s not really a dance with me. Oh no I demanded all the balloons and now I’m floating away someone save me. This chick puts Kanye to shame.
Donald: Kind of a jerk. Constantly rolling in with total disregard for what’s happening. AND WHERE ARE HIS PANTS???
Goofy: Obviously still on an acid trip that began in the 70s.
Pluto: Living life on the short end of the stick. He looks like a dog and acts like a dog while Goofy’s over here looking like a dog but acting like a human. What’s that about? Oh right. Acid trip.
Toodles: The glue keeping this whole mess together. Once this thing gets tired of hearing “Oh Toodles” every 2 seconds and bounces, the wheels are going to come flying off.