Back Home Again in Indiana
When you really think about it, it’s a miracle my child is still alive – he eats nothing but carbs, he never pays attention to where he’s walking, and I never know when he’s sick.
There was a stretch in July and August where Boogs was sleeping like a champ – not waking up in the night, sleeping until 9 or 9:30 on the weekends, taking 2 hours naps. . .basically being the dream child. Then right before we left for vacation, he either hit a bit of a growth spurt or remembered sleep is for the weak because he started sleeping like garbage again. I’m talking up a couple times in the middle of the night and up for the day before 6 in the am sleeping like garbage. Vacation obviously didn’t do anything to help the situation so when we got back and his sleeping got worse (one night he was up once every 90 minutes or so), I chalked it up to readjusting to real life and a possible hatred of me. And then Saturday he had a fever which meant my chalk reasoning was incorrect and I found myself with a fair amount of guilt for basically yelling at him for garbage sleeping (not my greatest moment, but you try being calm and patient at 4 in the am when you’ve already been up 5 times before then).
The problem is Boogser doesn’t tell me he doesn’t feel good; he just starts not sleeping. And since not sleeping has been his best life skill since the day he was born, I don’t notice anything’s off until he’s running a fever of 101 which then makes me feel like the worst mother in the world. But then I remember he’s the one who was acting like everything was fine in the first place so really it’s mostly on him that I didn’t even notice death was creeping in. And then I remember he’s not even 3 and this logic probably doesn’t apply until he’s at least 7 so I go back to feeling like a slightly unfit parent and overcompensate by letting him watch videos and movies all day. I draw the line at subsisting on nothing* but BBQ chips though. There has to be some semblance of standards over here.
*Spellcheck’s 1000% sure I meant “nuttin”** here and would like to know if it should always correct to “nuttin”. No, spellcheck. You should never correct to “nuttin”. Not even the once.
**Now it’s 1000% sure I meant “nothing”. We’re in a vicious cycle from which no one emerges victorious.